


The Stars My Solace

by AmazinglyMediocre



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Background Relationships, But also kind of an established thing?, But my silly episode 9 junk, Escape, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Kind of AU because it doesn't exist yet, Multiple Settings, Planet Hopping, Rey and Ben need a hug, Searching for a New Home, Slow Burn, i'm so bad at tags, idk - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-04 17:39:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15846141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmazinglyMediocre/pseuds/AmazinglyMediocre
Summary: Rey is sent in search of a new home for the Resistance while Ben is searching for her. Their paths cross with enormous consequences.----Also known as: another post-TLJ fanfic.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! I know there's probably more than one similar fic out there, but I hope this is different enough that it doesn't look copied. (I had this idea forever ago and just rediscovered it!) 
> 
> I'd love to say this is how I see Episode 9 going, but it really isn't. So I guess it isn't one of those fics? It's just post-TLJ feels and writing :)
> 
> Also, please bear with me! I'm mixing new writing and old writing, so there might be some weird continuity errors that I've failed to catch. This is also one of my first Star Wars fics, so it'll probably feel flat at first!
> 
> Final note: this does change POVs between Rey and Ben! I think the switches are pretty clear, but I'm going to go ahead and say it too!

He felt the full force of Rey’s disappointment and anger as the door slid shut between them. And he felt ashamed because of it. All of the fury and fire that consumed him sputtered out, leaving him with nothing but regret and shame that sat deep in his bones and weighed him down like coals piled on top of his shoulders.

            He could barely even sense her anymore, just a trace of light racing away from him. He sensed his mother, though, strong and clear. They were headed straight for Naboo. He didn’t dare to follow them.

            But he had to do something. Skywalker’s death drove him to it. The Jedi was dead, he knew. Something in him didn’t want it to be in vain. A darker part of him did.

            “Supreme Leader,” Hux’s voice drifted in from the main chamber. “We’ve found their escape route.”

            “It doesn’t matter,” he stood up and strode back into the vaulted hangar. “We can’t follow them from here.” He wished he could hide his face, hide the pain he was sure was written across it.

            The general swallowed and looked towards the rear of the hangar. “I believe you will want to see it.”

            Ben followed the strung out line of stormtroopers to the back of the cavern and down a tiny hallway. He knew the old rebels were notorious for winding hallways and low ceilings, made evident by the occasional clack of a stormtrooper’s helmet on a particularly low point.

            “This is it,” Hux spoke from behind him, craning his neck to be near his shoulder. “Somehow they moved all of these rocks before we could get to them.”

            He paused when the hallway suddenly opened up into a large hole. The gap led into a gulley, marked with red footprints across and up the hill on the other side. There were rocks strewn about the path, but they weren’t covered in salt like everything else was.

            “They didn’t do this,” Ben walked to the middle of the gulley. “This is the girl’s work.”

            Hux blinked. “The girl’s work? Supreme Leader, she is just a girl,” He began to protest. “The rest of the rebels couldn’t possibly move them, so how could _she_?”

            Ben turned to face the general. “She’s a Jedi, imbecile. How do you think she managed to murder Supreme Leader Snoke without help from the Force?” He strode into the cave and didn’t stop until he was back inside the shuttle kicking red off of his boots.

“Return to whatever destroyer we have left,” he spoke as soon as he sat down. He didn’t want to look at the mess that was in front of them. The salt was destroyed, spattered red in every direction like blood.

            He didn’t bother to listen to the pilots chatter to each other or watch as Hux sat down across from him. They lifted off of the ground and turned towards the stars.

            “They couldn’t have gotten far,” Hux spoke up. “That junk freighter couldn’t have escaped our radar.” His typical bravado was coming back. “They probably fled to Naboo. We will find them shortly.”

            “I won’t be coming with you,” he watched as the general’s face twisted. “I’m going to Ahch-To to ensure that Skywalker is finished.”

            “You have to help us in this,” Hux nearly leapt to his feet, his face turning red. “This is our chance to squash the Resistance once and for all, and you’re running to some island in the Outer Rim! The longer we leave them be, the harder they will be to find!”

            “You’re afraid, then,” Ben rose to meet him, watching the smaller man shrink back towards his seat. “We will not be searching for them until we can gather our forces again. There’s no sense in mounting an attack on Naboo with what little we have left.”

            “Of course,” he sat back down, refusing to meet his gaze. Despite his sullen look, there was still defiance in his voice. Like a kicked dog. He practically scuttled out of the shuttle once they landed, followed closely by their pilots.

            There was a cluster of aides waiting on him. “Get me a stocked shuttle,” Ben ordered as soon as he stepped out of the ship. “No pilots.”

            “There’s one at the end of the hangar,” a blonde-haired girl pointed towards the far wall. “Will you need any assistance?”

            Ben turned and strode towards the high wings. He didn’t know why he needed to go to Ahch-To. He just did. Even though Skywalker was dead, he still had unanswered questions.

            Perhaps that was why he was going.

            He sat down in the cockpit and entered the coordinates from what he had seen in Rey’s mind. They were seared into his thoughts and memories. So was she.

            Much of his flight was spent pacing the rear of the shuttle as the autopilot controlled the ship. Ahch-To was practically worthless; it was a planet of storms and tiny islands like the one Luke inhabited. And yet there must have been some kind of value to it; his uncle didn’t choose a planet at random.

            With thoughts of Ahch-To came thoughts of Rey, as unwanted as they were. He didn’t want to think about her, didn’t want to want her. He did anyways. She was his other half; his equal match. And she had shut him out. He didn’t know if he would ever get the chance to make things right. If she would let him make things right. He couldn’t help but reach out, searching for her through the Force. She was nowhere to be found.

            He was forced out of his thoughts when the shuttle burst out of hyperspace with a chorus of beeps. Ben slid back into the pilot’s seat and stared at the planet before him. Which island was he even looking for?

            The island made itself known. He sensed the power coming from below him, hidden beneath heavy gray clouds. He didn’t know what awaited him.

            The shuttle bay door opened to pouring rain and a distant crackle of thunder. Ben didn’t bother to search for a cloak as he stepped from steel to rough grass. It didn’t take long for his hair to become plastered to his forehead and for rivulets of water to find their way underneath his collar.

            He walked up a steep hill, the only sounds being the constant rush of rain and distant bird cries and the wind breathing his name.

            “Ben, Ben, Solo, Ben Solo,” the wind whispered. The sound swirled around him and drew him towards a deep valley on his left. Something dark and twisted sat in the center of it. And it called to him.

            He hesitated. He was searching for whatever Luke left behind, for something to take back to the First Order as evidence that the Jedi was dead. But did it matter? He was the one in control.

            Ben turned towards the valley. It smelled faintly of smoke, drifting from the shape in its center. He saw it more clearly as he came closer. It was a tree, burnt out and blackened by fire. The force beckoned him closer.

            He wrapped his hand around the hilt of his lightsaber and stepped closer, the scent of smoke sitting in his nose. A part of him felt apprehensive, tightening his grip on his lightsaber. A larger part of him strove towards that tree.

            He bent his head and stepped through a gaping hole in the side of the tree. Inside, the tree was pristine and nearly petrified. It wasn’t natural. He didn’t understand how it wasn’t burnt out entirely and reduced to a pile of ash.

            At the heart of the tree was a shelf. It was empty, but he could smell the must of old books. The wood behind it was deeply grooved into tendrils that began just above the shelf. The floor and the walls around him were worn smooth with time.

            Ben reached out to touch the shelf, sensing the strength of the force flowing through the ancient wood and through his bones. He shut his eyes for just a moment and saw the books that had rested there. And, as if in fast motion, he watched as ancient hands placed them there, growing younger and younger as the books were moved and opened and shuffled around. Finally, at the end of it all, he saw a familiar form hurriedly gathering the books into her arms and fleeing from the tree.

            “Why are you showing me this?” he spoke to nothing and everything at once. Lightning flickered in response. He left the tree, following a footpath that had been followed by countless other feet. They led him up one side of the valley and to the crest of a ridge. Several stone huts sat below him, the farthest of which was shattered into a thousand pieces. The village was still and silent in the storm.

            He started down the hill, his feet scrabbling on loose rocks and his hands reaching for tufts of grass that wouldn’t hold. He nearly fell into the center of the village. His foot crunched on a broken antenna.

            Ben started towards the destroyed hut. He knew this place. He knew that there would be the cinders of a long-extinguished fire in the center of a ring of smashed stones and Rey’s coarse blanket draped across the rocks. He sat down on the rocks across from it, though he couldn’t bring himself to face where she sat.

            Part of him hoped she’d be there when he looked up, but she wasn’t. There was nothing there for him.

            Ben stood back up, grabbing the blanket as he rose to his feet. He couldn’t waste his time on what had already happened. But he couldn’t bring himself to let go. His eyes rested on Luke’s hut for a long moment, contemplating.

            The hut was tiny inside, all rocky furniture and few decorations. He rifled through a few boxes and containers, searching for anything to bring him closure. First he had struck down Han in anger, and then Luke. There was no reward in it, no peace.

            “Back so soon?” His uncle’s rough voice came from behind him. He turned to see Luke as he had been on Crait, though he was translucent and blue this time. A ghost. “You can’t kill a ghost, you know.”

            “I’m looking for answers,” Ben turned away again and continued shuffling through the container. It was full of cloaks and musty old clothing, including an old black leather jacket with a blue stripe down the sleeve. His father’s. He pulled it out and tucked it under one arm.

            “You’re not going to find them in there,” Luke’s tone was light. “Don’t be stealing your father’s stuff.”

            “It’s more mine than yours now,” he retorted.

            “Really, Ben, what are you searching for?”

            “What was special about this place?” he didn’t look at the Jedi. “You came here, but why here? You could have hidden anywhere else in the galaxy.”

            Luke sighed. “This is a special place. The birthplace of the Jedi Order. I came here to ensure that no one else would find it, at least not without destroying the last Jedi.”

            “Why? I thought you’d want to see the return of the Jedi,” Ben reached the bottom of the box and shook his head. Not what he’d been looking for.

            “After you, I didn’t want to see a Force user ever again. The Jedi Order was full of failures, and I was the last in a long line of them.”

            He straightened up and looked at his uncle. “Then why did you train Rey?”

            “And he finally reveals what he’s truly after,” Luke laughed to himself. “You won’t turn her, you know.”

            “I’m not looking to turn her,” Ben knelt down to pull a metal box out from under the bed. “I’m looking for answers.”

            “I trained her to teach her why the Jedi Order had to end. I couldn’t let another failure happen, not like what happened with you, or with Vader before you.”

            “But you fought for Vader,” he pried the box open and saw a bundle of papers and a cloth bag. “You never fought for anything again.”

            “Because I saw the conflict in my father,” Luke’s voice was full of something he couldn’t decipher. “I thought your choice was made.”

            He shook his head as he unrolled the papers. “It wasn’t made. You—what happened made the decision for me.” Ben skimmed the handwritten notes for a moment. “It was the wrong decision.”

            “Now you see it,” He wasn’t smug at all. Luke paused for a long moment. He wondered if his uncle had disappeared. “Snoke wanted you for your power. And it twisted you.”

            “For my bloodline,” he put the papers away and pulled out the bag. He knew what was in it as soon as he lifted it. “He wanted the next Vader.” It was what he was looking for.

            “As the Emperor wanted in me,” Luke paused again. “As he wanted Anakin for his power.”

            Ben pulled the lightsaber out of the bag. It was the one Luke had always carried, with a thin, banded body and raised emitter. The blade would be green if he activated it. He put it back in the box and picked up the whole thing.

            “What do you want with that old thing?” he turned to face his uncle. “You have yours.”

            “The one Rey carried was broken,” Ben tucked the box inside of his father’s jacket and walked towards the door. “What does anyone want with a lightsaber?”

            “I’d be careful with that one,” Luke winked, then disappeared.

            He wasn’t sure which one his uncle was referring to.

            The walk back to his shuttle was another soaking one, especially when he was using his cape to keep his father’s jacket and the box dry. He set the stuff down in the copilot’s seat once he reached the shuttle and shrugged his wet layers off. He had to go back to the First Order at some point, no matter how badly he didn’t want to. Someone had to keep Hux from destroying the galaxy in search of the Resistance.

           

            “We’re here?” Rey rose to her feet and felt a breath of relief as the Falcon touched down.

            She pushed her way towards the landing ramp and saw Leia and Poe walking down onto clean stone that reflected the bright sunlight back up at her.

            “Welcome, General Organa,” someone spoke. “It is always good to see a relative of Padme Amidala’s. Where is the rest of your fleet?” Her voice was diplomatic. The voice of a politician, Rey had learned.

            “This is it,” Leia’s voice barely gave away her sadness. “The First Order destroyed everything else.”

            “Everything?” the woman was surprised. “Surely not.”

            “Everything,” Leia confirmed. “We’ve just fled from Crait and are looking for any help we can find.”

            There was a short pause. “Of course,” she finally said. The diplomatic voice was back. “We will support you in any way that we can. Naboo is no supporter of the First Order.”

            Rey started down the ramp when Poe appeared, waving up at her and the semicircle of people watching. She reached the bottom of the ramp and looked up to see what was surely the most beautiful planet in the galaxy. It was nothing like she had seen before, between the jungles of Yavin 4 and the deserts of Jakku and the rocky slopes of Ahch-To. Grassy plains spread out on her left and right, and in front of her sat a city of tan stone and green tile. Waterfalls rushed down steep cliffs, disappearing into rivers that wound their way through the plains and eventually down another cliff.

            “Welcome to Naboo, Resistance fighters.” Rey saw a young woman with her face painted white and her hair piled up into an ornate headdress. Her form was hidden beneath heavy robes that looked softer than anything she had touched. She must have been the queen. Behind her stood a tall creature with a long, thin neck and a strange head with stalked eyes.

            Poe paused next to her. “Don’t stare at the Gungans too long,” he grinned. “They’ll win every time.”

            She looked at him. “What is this place?”

            “Naboo,” his eyes wandered the landscape. “It’s a generally peaceful planet, though it saw its fair share of conflict in the Clone Wars. It was the home of Sheev Palpatine before he became the Emperor.” He patted her shoulder. “Wait until you see the Gungan cities. They’re underwater.”

            “How can a city be underwater?” she gaped at him as he walked back towards Leia.

            Rey was even more amazed when she saw the inside of the city. Children ran and played about them, dancing with ribbons on the ends of sticks and creating crowns out of flowers. The buildings were painted with colorful murals and the stone walkways carved with intricate patterns that had worn smooth with time.

            “Miss, miss,” a little girl stopped her by a fountain, grabbing at the edge of her tunic. “I want you to wear this,” she held up one of the flower crowns. Rey knelt down and bowed her head. The girl rose to her toes to put the crown on her head.

            “Thank you,” she smiled at the girl as she stood back up. “It’s beautiful.”

            “You look like a queen,” the girl gazed up at her with awe painted across her face. Rey wondered what she might look like as a ruler, how different things might be if she had accepted Ben’s offer. It didn’t matter now.

            The actual queen led their small group through the city and into the center building—the royal palace, she realized. It was the largest building around, with towering stone pillars wrapped in flowering vines and massive windows. Huge wooden doors, polished and gilded, opened before them and led them into a high-ceilinged atrium. Rey had to force herself not to stare at the domed ceiling and instead followed the group into the wing on their left.

            A smaller set of doors led them to a tall staircase, then to an open-air walkway. They commanded a view of the palace gardens, walled in and surrounded by the green rooftops of the city.

            They were finally shown a long hallway of apartments. “Welcome to your new home, friends. You will have all of the supplies you need until you are ready to fight again.” The queen gestured at the doors.

            “Thank you, your highness,” she heard Leia speaking. “We won’t be a burden.”

            Rey found herself sharing an apartment with Finn and Poe, though Finn was nowhere to be found. The stormtrooper had chosen to stay with Chewbacca and Rose on the Falcon, or wherever Rose was being treated. She suspected Poe would often be gone, tending to Leia and other official duties. Chewbacca would most likely stay on the Falcon.

            “So, what’s your story?” Poe appeared in her bedroom doorway. She set the pieces of her lightsaber on an ornate dresser and turned to face him. “Where did you come from?”

            “Jakku,” she lifted the flowers from her head and looked down at them. “Before that, I don’t remember. I scavenged from the wreckage there to stay alive. Now I know that it was the Empire’s wreckage.”

            “From the Battle of Jakku. And then BB-8 found you.”

            “Yes, and then BB-8 found me.” She turned to place the crown next to the lightsaber.

            “And now all of this has happened. Word’s getting out that you killed the Supreme Leader.” Any humor in his voice had faded away. “How did you do it?”

            Rey blinked. “What?”

            “You killed Snoke,” his brow furrowed. “Right? They’re saying that Kylo Ren is the new Supreme Leader.”

            She shook her head. “I didn’t kill Snoke,” she watched his face twist even more. “I couldn’t have. He was stronger than anyone I’ve seen.”

            Poe straightened up, his shoulder leaving the doorframe. “Then who did?”

            “Be—Kylo Ren did,” she breathed. “Kylo Ren killed him. Snoke had my lightsaber on the throne and he used the Force to activate it and cut Snoke in half instead of killing me.”

            He looked at her for a long moment, the gears turning in his head. Rey could only think of Ben. Had he blamed her for Snoke’s death? “That’s supposedly Sith tradition, for the apprentice to kill his master and take his place. There can only be so many Sith, or something like that.”

            Rey dumped her pack on the floor and sighed. “I don’t think it was because of that,” she sat down on her bed. “It’s more complicated than that.”

            “Explain,” Poe sat down on the foot of her bed, propping one knee up on it and resting his elbow on his knee. He seemed to be a naturally curious person, always searching for more information to drink in and use. He wasn’t too different from her, if she thought about it that way. “How can it be complicated?”

            “I can’t explain it,” she shook her head. She very well could explain it, but telling Poe would expose just how close she and Ben had become. She hated the thought, both of a new friend scorning her and that Ben still couldn’t let go. “I can’t read his mind.” That was also a lie.

            “Yeah, I guess,” Poe shrugged. “Seems like you’ve been there for almost all the good action. For BB-8 and Jakku, for Starkiller Base, for the Supremacy. Hell, you were in the throne room. You saw Snoke himself.”

            “Seeing Snoke himself isn’t something to be celebrated,” she frowned. “You talk about it like I’m some kind of hero.”

            “You are, though,” the pilot was earnest. “You saved the resistance on more than one occasion and stopped Kylo Ren from destroying everything.” He leaned forward. “You’re Rey from Jakku. You’re a symbol of hope for the rest of us.”

            Somehow she couldn’t stand being seen as a hero. Not when she was entangled with the dark side, not when she was just along for the ride. Not when she came from dirty blood and grew up scavenging.

            “What’s your story?” she changed the subject as soon as she could.

            “My parents were leaders in the rebellion. I grew up in this, I guess. Nothing special. Just base-hopping and constantly running from the First Order. At least, until I learned how to fly. Then I learned how to stand up and fight, and the rest of the resistance stood with me.” He fiddled with the sleeves on his jacket. “But I messed it up. I made the wrong decision when the First Order found us. I got most of our fleet killed and gave them the opportunity to track us.” Poe set his jaw. “I’m still trying to make that right.”

            Rey kicked her boots off and tucked her feet underneath herself. “You’ll make a great leader of the Resistance. Leia knows it too.”

            Poe silently nodded, his throat working and his fingers restless. “I know. I just don’t know if I’m ready.”

            “Sometimes you can’t wait until you’re ready,” she gave the best smile she could. It still felt flimsy.

            “You’re right,” Poe nodded and returned the smile. “I’ll leave you alone. Thanks for the talk.”

            “Of course,” Rey reached up and tugged the tie out of her hair as he stood and left the room. She needed to clean up and clear her head after Crait.

Ben was gone, but the pressure of the Resistance relying on her wasn’t. It was good to know that she wasn’t the only one with too much pressure on their shoulders.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter 2! I hope it's clear, but there's a time jump between this and the first chapter.
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated!

            “Rey, Finn, I have an assignment for you.” Both of them watched Leia as she eased herself into a seat in front of them. “I know we’ve been comfortable here for the past several weeks, but we can’t stay here forever. I would hate to bring the war to Naboo without their request.”

            “What’s the assignment?” Finn cocked his head to the side. “Go take down the First Order again?”

            “No, Finn,” she shook her head with a faint smile. “I need you to find us a suitable place to stay. There are a few old locations that might just work out for us.”

            Rey nodded. “Where do you want us to go?”

            “Start with Hoth. It’s fortified and hidden enough that we could easily build our forces up again and eventually take on the First Order.”

            “Hoth?” Finn protested. “That place is a wasteland. I swear, that planet is made of snow.”

            “There are old Rebellion bases hidden on the planet. They’re hidden within the glaciers and hewn out of the ice. You should be fine, so long as you avoid Wampas.” Leia waved her hand at them, a sly smile on her face. “Now get out of here. You can’t be happy cooped up in this palace.”

            Rey couldn’t help but feel as if she was trapped as they left. Trapped into helping the Resistance.

 

            It was cold. Beyond cold, actually. Ben felt as if his fingers would fall off and his nose was frozen. He was standing in the middle of blank gray space, his body wrapped in layer upon layer of clothes. Where was he? How did he end up here? The last thing he remembered was going to sleep the night before.

            He wasn’t in empty space, he realized. He was in the middle of a blizzard. A storm the likes of which had only ever been recorded on Hoth. He grew colder, the gray darkening until he could barely see. Ice and snow pelted him, slapping on the shoulders of his outer coat and stinging his face. The wind battered him, filling his ears with roaring and deafening his senses.

            Ben reached numb fingers to his side and wrapped them around the body of his lightsaber. His skin stuck to it like his tongue would to a frozen pole. Where was Hux? The First Order?

            He could barely find the switch on the saber. He hunched down, trying to see where the switch was. He was very well going to die if the First Order didn’t find him soon.

            It wasn’t his lightsaber. He was seeing through Rey’s eyes.

            Where was she? He knew he could withstand the freezing chill for longer than she could; she just wasn’t acclimated to the cold after her life on Jakku. He had to find her. But he couldn’t wake up.

            The lightsaber wasn’t a lightsaber at all. It was her long fighting staff, still wrapped around her shoulders by the strap. She wasn’t going to survive a blizzard with nothing but a staff.

Ben opened his eyes to the darkness of his makeshift quarters on Hux’s new Dreadnaught. The general had commissioned the ship as his first order as military commander of the First Order. Ben had barely managed to maintain a superior ranking in the weeks that followed the fall of the Supremacy and Snoke’s death.

It was a dream. A force dream. He had been in Rey’s place, been in her body. He had even controlled her movements for a short moment. Had she been in his? Did she need him?

He stood up and shuffled to the sink. He wished he hadn’t dreamt at all. And yet, as of late, his mind had been consumed with her. Rey was gone, fled to force-knows-where, and he couldn’t get her out of his head. The Force hadn’t connected them in weeks. Still, he had reached out almost constantly, searching for just a whisper of her breath or the tiniest scent of her.

It seemed that their connection had changed somehow, from seeing each other to seeing inside of each other.

Ben turned to face the large window that filled one wall of his chambers. The stars shone back, cold and bright. He could see the small yellow orb of Tatooine in the distance, nearly hidden between its two suns. He felt some kind of comfort staring out at the empty darkness beyond the stars. Its depths were endless.

His view was interrupted by a fleet of destroyers blasting into view, their forms appearing out of the flash of hyperspace. A resonating boom followed, reverberating through his window and rattling his lightsaber on his table.

The almost constant sensation of being trapped returned to him once again.

He turned away, his feet padding on the cold floor until he swung them back into bed. Rey would survive. If she truly needed him, she would have said so. It didn’t change his desire to save her, to see her again.

His body was warm but his mind was elsewhere, stinging in the freezing cold.

 

Rey cursed to herself when the wind nearly knocked her over. The flakes of snow and ice were growing darker and heavier, nearly to the point of making her claustrophobic. She forced Ben out of her head, out of her eyesight. Knowing him, he’d betray her location to the First Order just so that he could come and find her.

Still, she couldn’t help but wonder why he was suddenly connected with her again after so long apart. All she sensed from him was confusion and worry, instead of malice and intent.

Where was Chewie? He was supposed to be bringing the Falcon around to get her. The Wookiee was probably too scared to fly in the blizzard. She hoped Finn would talk some sense into him. Her friend was slowly learning to understand Chewbacca and R2 and BB-8, despite his previous apprehensions about all three of them.

She reached out through the force, searching for anywhere that she could find shelter. Their reconnaissance mission was very quickly going awry; she was entirely unable to find the base on Hoth and a violent blizzard was rushing in.

There it was. Rey turned towards her senses and began to trudge through the snow. She had no idea where she was going, but she knew it was there. She had most likely been standing right on top of it.

Sure enough, she tripped and fell into a Rebellion-era trench, complete with bones and old rags that crinkled under her feet. She forced herself to stand up again, her hands stinging from where they hit the ground. Her joints were so, so stiff. Her ring finger stung where she had ripped it free from her staff.

The force led her through the trench and right into a closed door. Rey jabbed the end of her staff between the two panels and used her own strength and the force to break it open. It was completely dark inside. She had heard stories of the horrors that inhabited Hoth, including the snow creature that had nearly killed Luke. But, thanks to Leia, she knew what to watch out for. A closed door was a good sign.

She stepped inside. Hoth was hellishly cold and viciously uninhabitable, but the rebels had made it home once. Maybe the Resistance could make it home again.

Rey picked her way through winding dark hallways, carved out of eternally frozen ice and held up in places by decaying rods. She pulled out a flashlight and turned it on, the thin beam turning the ice white and yellow. Her path led to the main hangar, where she knew the Millennium Falcon had once rested for a time.

Echo Base was right. The entire hangar bounced with her light footsteps. The ice somehow glowed, lightening the room and making it possible to see beyond the yellow glow of her flashlight. She shut it off. The high arches of glacier ice above her head were just the same as Leia had described them. The general was fighting to revive the Alliance, and her mind took her to old Rebellion bases.

It felt almost warm inside, sheltered from the howling wind. She couldn’t even hear the raging storm anymore. Perhaps Leia was onto something, sending her to Echo Base. The snow constantly hid the base, it seemed, and the base itself was structurally sound within the chambers of a glacier.

She wasn’t alone. It wasn’t Ben, though. He was gone for the time being, though his shape was still burned into the shadows in the blizzard.

“Rey,” the walls breathed. She slowly turned, scanning the hangar. She knew that voice.

“Yes?” She whispered. Her voice sounded as if it came from behind her. The acoustics were unsettling, to say the least. “Who are you?”

“A friend,” the voice became more centered, seeming to localize next to her.

She turned to see an old man wrapped in pale white robes standing next to her, his shape outlined in blue. He was nearly translucent. “You’ve spoken to me before,” Rey could feel the strength of the force surrounding him.

“I have,” he smiled. He had a kind face and an accent not unlike hers. “My name is Obi Wan Kenobi,” he bowed his head. “I was with you when you found the lightsaber.” She saw eternal youth in him, in the shine of his eyes and the color in his cheeks.

Obi Wan Kenobi. His name sounded as if it came from a bygone time. “Were you a Jedi?” She tried to unstick her fingers from her staff.

“I was,” his smile grew. “I fought in the Clone Wars and began Luke’s training.” The Clone Wars. She knew that Anakin Skywalker was trained during that time. Did Obi Wan know him?

“He said he was taught by a man named Ben,” she paused. “And by Master Yoda.”

“I am Ben,” he laughed. “Old Man Ben from Tatooine. Leia called on me during the war with the old Empire. I suppose that Han and Leia felt strongly enough about me to name their son after me.” That was a revelation. Rey felt as if she didn’t want to become tangled in the strings that surrounded the Skywalkers. Too late for that one.

“I don’t want to be disrespectful,” Rey winced as she unstuck her index finger. “But why are you here? I thought that ghosts would only visit when someone needed them.”

“You do need me,” his face grew serious. “Echo Base is not the home for the new Resistance. You’re not looking to hide, you’re looking to stand up. Naboo is the place to do that.”

Rey’s heart sunk. She had grown more and more confident in Hoth the more that she thought about it. And here Obi Wan was, telling her not to. “We can fight from here,” she tried to argue. “And the First Order will never find us.”

“The First Order might not,” Obi Wan gave her a pointed look. “But Ben Solo will eventually find you. Your destinies are tied together tighter than any others.” She glanced around, almost expecting her dark-haired counterpart to be with them. He had been with her earlier, watching her. “See?” Kenobi gestured at her. “You’re afraid he’s with us even now.”

“That doesn’t mean the Resistance can’t find a home here,” she looked up at the roof of the cavern. “I don’t have to be with them.”

Obi Wan sighed. “Leia’s intentions are good, but her heart is in the wrong place. She wants to return to old haunts, places she knows to be safe.” His eyes brightened, but it wasn’t quite a warm shine. “These places aren’t safe. You have the chance to destroy the First Order once and for all, and she’s looking to run and hide.”

“Tell me where,” she pleaded. His shape was shimmering and fading. “I don’t know where to go, if not Naboo.”

“The force will tell you,” his voice was the last echo before he disappeared entirely.

“You are the force!” Rey kicked at a fallen icicle in frustration, then realized the implications of that icicle.

Something had to be melting the ice for an icicle to form. She flicked on her flashlight for a closer look. There was even moisture still dripping around her. She looked up and saw a ledge directly above her head. And looking down from that ledge was a horribly ugly face.

She took off back the way she had come, her feet slipping and sliding on the frozen floor. The Wampa dropped down behind her with a loud roar. She couldn’t outrun it, not in these conditions.

And, with bad timing as always, Ben Solo appeared in her mind. She didn’t have the focus to kick him out, not now. She wasn’t even sure that she wanted to kick him out. She needed all the help she could get.

“What do you want?” She cried, forcing her numb body to work. The tip of her staff scraped on the ceiling above her, sending flakes of ice showering down behind her.

“Go for the arms,” Ben spoke, his voice sounding like a thought in her head. “A Wampa can’t hurt you if it doesn’t have anything to swing with.”

Rey glanced over her shoulder and was met with a body of dreadlocked white fur. The stench coming from the beast was horrible.

The Wampa was right behind her. It reached for her and sent her flying down the hallway. The breath rushed from her lungs when she hit the wall, then slid down to the floor. Her staff skittered away from her hands and her head spun. The Wampa charged at her as she tried to roll and grab the staff.

“The arms!” Ben shouted. She listened for once, swinging her staff up and using it to keep the beast away from her. The heavy stink coming from it made her eyes water and her throat tickle. She wiggled out from underneath it, narrowly avoiding another swipe of its claws, and used the strap on her staff to wrap its paws and twisted as hard as she could. Her sleeve was sliced open as she continued to twist, using the Force to turn the staff tighter until she heard a crude pop and the Wampa screeched in pain.

It roared, staggering backwards. Rey took her opportunity to free her staff and thrust it forward, striking the beast in the head. Her own head was pounding.

“You’re hurt,” he said as she backed down the corridor. More claws scraped down the way, coming from the hangar. A second Wampa? “Why are you on Hoth? I’m coming to get you.”

Rey closed him out of her mind with a shake of her head and took off towards the entrance.

She bowled into Finn outside, both of them tumbling into the snow. A skull stared at her from underneath a snow bank.

They both paused, completely dazed. “We need to go,” Rey finally pushed herself off of him and helped him up. “It’s a Wampa den.”

“A what den? Wampa?” He stood up and brushed himself off. “Did one of them get you?”

Rey whipped around when she heard the heavy breathing of the two Wampas just inside the door. She held her staff out, waiting for the horrible face to appear. Finn drew his own blaster and they backed away as quickly as they could.

The first Wampa appeared, blood running red down its face. Finn fired several times, somehow managing to hit the beast between the eyes. It fell forward into the snow. The second Wampa peeked out, saw the two of them, and then retreated back into the tunnel.

They turned tail and ran as soon as it was gone, scrambling out of the trench and back into the full brunt of the storm. The glow of the Falcon’s thrusters guided them to the ship.

Chewie whined when they flopped down in the cockpit, chattering to her about not communicating and disappearing. Rey flicked the switches she needed to and brought her knees up to her chest, hugging them for some kind of warmth. He continued to rumble, halfway to himself, as he started the ship’s engine and took off into the sky.

“What happened in there?” Finn finally asked. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost or something.” He sat forward to stick his head between the pilots’ seats.

Rey smiled. “I did see a ghost. I saw Obi Wan Kenobi.”

“And you’re happy about that?” Finn leaned back to look at her. “I mean, good for you, but I’d be out of there if I saw a ghost.”

“He was an old Jedi master,” she shook her head. “Sometimes a ghost in the force will appear to help those who need it.”

“Is this, like, a weird Jedi thing?”

“I don’t know,” Rey shrugged her uninjured shoulder. “He spoke to me when I found his lightsaber.”

Chewbacca nodded and grumbled his agreement.

“See? Chewie knows. He went by Old Man Ben when he helped Leia escape the Empire.” She gave the stormtrooper a smug grin.

“Y’all are weird,” Finn stood up and walked to the door. “I’m going to get some rest.”

Rey couldn’t stop thinking of Ben. He was racing towards Hoth. Towards her. And he was doing it for her, not for the First Order or even his own interests.

Maybe they could try again. If there was really anything to begin with.

 

“Kylo Ren,” Hux spoke from behind him. The general—no, commander—had a way of sneaking up on him. It was strange; he could sense nearly anyone around him. But not Hux.

“Yes?” Ben looked over one shoulder to look at the other man.

“It’s time to begin the hunt in earnest,” Hux’s eyes were rimmed with red and underlined by dark circles. He had been growing more and more restless as time went on.

“The hunt has been on ever since the girl murdered Snoke,” Ben turned away from the bridge windows to face him. “The Resistance is very difficult to find.”

Truthfully, the Resistance had disappeared. He had found absolutely no sign of them anywhere, not even on his trip to Hoth the night before. The only sign that anything had happened was the pried-open door and dead Wampa.

Ben left Echo Base as soon as he could after that; it was eerie.

Hux narrowed his eyes. “The Resistance is likely in the Outer Rim by this point. Our spies have heard word of the Millennium Falcon, however. And if it’s still in the hands of that damn Wookiee, it won’t be difficult to track.”

Ben kept his face straight and looked back towards the stars. “The Millennium Falcon is the least of our worries. The Wookiee will most likely return to smuggling.” He knew that at least Rey was traveling with Chewbacca. Some of the other Resistance members might be as well. He wasn’t about to let Hux get in the way of his own intentions.

The commander paused for a long moment. He couldn’t sense his thoughts, couldn’t determine his plan of action. Before Rey, he hadn’t been bothered by it; Hux wasn’t a threat to anything he cared for. Hux wasn’t a threat to anything, really. Snoke kept the both of them on an incredibly tight leash. And what was a thin, pasty general if he couldn’t act without approval?

Now that Snoke was dead and Rey was all he could think about, Hux was a threat to everything. Ben knew that the commander had nearly killed him in Snoke’s chambers. His colleague had a target on his back, he was sure. He didn’t need to read his mind to see that. He was the obstacle in his way to becoming Supreme Leader.

“If you are trying to protect the girl,” Hux growled, “You will not be able to for long.”

Ben searched the stars for what he wanted. He wanted peace. Rey’s presence found him instead. She was silent and still. Still, it was a change from the normal. For her to even be there was unusual. Though she was a peaceful presence, he felt no calmer.

“That’s what you’re doing, isn’t it?” Hux kept his voice dangerously low; none of the attending officers or bridge troopers would hear. If they did, they would never tell. “Protecting the girl.” He knew an explosion was imminent.

And no matter what he answered, it was going to be the wrong answer.

“No,” he turned his chin up. “I’m exercising my knowledge of the Wookiee’s habits and General Leia’s behavior. She won’t let her only Jedi out of her sight. The girl is the Resistance’s most valuable asset.” Objectively, Poe Dameron was their most effective and destructive asset. He could destroy entire fleets with just a few X-wings, or bomb ground forces into the next century. Rey, however, was more valuable to morale. Who could stop the Resistance if they had a Jedi?

“It’s your mother then?” Hux stepped closer. Rey’s presence grew, her mind stirring. He caught just the slightest glimpse of her in their reflection on the windows. She was confused.

He clasped his hands behind his back. “It’s our inability to find the Resistance. All your intelligence has been following is shadows and whispers in the dark.” He could find Rey in an instant. She knew it, too.

“Then perhaps you ought to hunt the girl down. She seems to be a shining light in this _darkness_ ,” Hux raised his voice, slapping a hand onto Ben’s shoulder and turning him to face him. “Or are you scared to face her?”

“Just as afraid as you are,” Ben shot back.

Hux’s eyes widened for just a moment. His blind shot had hit something, at least. “Get off of my bridge,” he snarled.

“Are you in any position to order me around?” Ben knew he had changed the game.

Hux’s hand slid down to his blaster. “You are on _my_ ship,” he spat, flecks of spittle flying.

“In _my_ fleet,” he glanced over the commander. “Watch your step,” he hissed.

Truthfully, playing Kylo Ren had grown exhausting. Kylo was the creature in the mask, the thing that led the First Order’s assault on the Resistance. Ben Solo was the man trying to change, trying to abandon the twisted creature that hid behind a voice distortion device and a cruel lightsaber. Ben Solo was chasing after the light and trying to pull her into the shade. He didn’t want to be stuck in pitch-black darkness any longer.

He didn’t speak until he was safe in his quarters. “Come to me,” he whispered. Rey’s breathing matched his own as she appeared in the reflection in his window. “Help me end this,” he spoke with more strength, more assurance. She was listening. He reached up, pressing his hand to the glass. His forehead was soon to follow.

“I can’t,” she finally spoke. Her voice was pained. “The Resistance needs me. They need hope.” His one chance to speak to her and she rejected him.

Ben looked up and saw her matching him, hand pressed to the other side of the glass and her own head bowed under the immense weight of the people relying upon her. She was a beacon to the Resistance, the one expected to save them all. Her, the scavenger from Jakku. The girl from nothing.

And here he was, the opposite beacon for the First Order. So long as Kylo Ren was in control, the troops had something to follow. He was the ideal driving them, the one who would lead them to victory. And Kylo wasn’t him.

They were the two sides of the same coin, forever joined and forever destined not to match.

“I need you,” he breathed. Rey was gone. He was left staring out at the stars.


	3. Chapter 3

Rey forced her sore body out of her seat and down the landing ramp. They were back at the temporary Resistance base. Her feet touched warm tile and a gentle breeze plucked at her hair.

Leia and Poe were waiting for them. The old general wrapped her in a hug, then held her still to look her over. Rey knew she was bruised and probably looked a little worse for wear. “Did one of them get you?” She asked.

“One did,” Rey nodded. “Finn killed it and the others won’t bother anyone with a blaster for a long time.”

They walked into the palace. It still amazed her every time she saw it.

“Did you find anything worth further investigation?” Leia held the crook of her elbow as she walked. “Anywhere we could go?” They passed through the main entrance and into the control room. It was outfitted from what they could salvage from the Falcon, as well as old gear from the Clone Wars.

“Not exactly,” Finn walked up to join them. “It’s uh…”

They stopped at the center command console, Leia sitting down heavily in one of the seats. “It’s what?”

“It’s a Wampa den,” Rey tucked her hands into her cloak.

“I was afraid that Echo Base would be a loss,” Leia sighed. “What about Jedha? Endor? What are our other options?”

“Endor is in the middle of a debris field,” Poe spoke up from where he stood behind her. “It’s very difficult to reach.”

“And that’s coming from the best pilot in the galaxy,” Finn nodded. “Besides, Endor is the location of a First Order outpost. It was set up in order to try and retrieve anything of use from the Death Star.”

“I would think the Ewoks scared everything away,” Leia bowed her head, staring down at her hands. Rey noticed how her knuckles were swollen and her skin paper-thin. She looked up at Poe. The pilot was Leia’s successor, whether he liked it or not. It was just a matter of time.

Poe caught her gaze and nodded, his face falling.

“Ewoks? Those things had better not be like those Porg critters,” Finn made a face. He had only been around the small birds for a few hours on the Falcon and had developed a severe dislike for them.

“Why not stay here?” Rose spoke up as she limped into the room. Finn immediately wrapped an arm around her waist to help support her. Though she had mostly recovered, she was still stuck with a ruined gait.

“Because it’s Naboo,” Poe replied. “We can’t mooch off of their resources and supplies forever. If the First Order finds us here, it’s all-out war, and that brings the war to a neutral planet. As far as we know, they don’t want to be involved in the fight.”

“But if they let us stay here, doesn’t that mean they side with us?” Rose protested.

“It means they support us, but that doesn’t mean they want the First Order launching an assault on their planet,” Poe shook his head.

“I agree with Poe,” Leia slowly stood, letting the pilot take her hand to help. “Investigate Jedha and Tatooine next.” Yet more places from when the Empire ruled the galaxy.

Poe caught the three of them as they left. “Hey,” he grabbed Finn’s shoulder. “Leia is sending you to places she knows, and though those have potential, they’re not exactly our best bets. I have a few places to try.” He glanced back into the bridge. The old general was watching them. He didn’t seem to mind that she knew what he was up to. “We still have the Mon Calamari, who will always be loyal to the Alliance. I know that I’m asking a lot of you, but I want you to check with them as well. If they can’t provide a place for us to stay, ask them who can.”

“Of course,” Rose spoke up. “We’ll check those, too.” Her attitude, as always, was almost overbearingly cheery. Rey glanced at Poe and knew that he felt the same. Sometimes too much optimism was a bad thing.

“Who said you’re coming?” Finn looked down at her. Rey didn’t know what to make of his expression, or how to react to her inviting herself along.

“I did,” Rose made a face at him. “I can walk, so therefore I can fly, too.”

Rey started to guide the other two away. “I’ll tell Chewbacca we have directives from you and Leia,” she nodded.

“You two go on ahead,” Poe waved Finn and Rose off. “I have to talk to Rey for a moment.”

Finn gave the pilot a strange look, but walked away all the same.

“Is there something you need?” Rey frowned.

“I need you to speak to one of Leia’s contacts on Coruscant. She’s a Togruta, supposedly used to be a Jedi. You should probably leave Rose and Finn here for that one, simply because we can’t afford to lose her and you’re the least likely to get caught.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Heck, you might even be better just going by yourself, without the Falcon. I can see about arranging transportation for you.”

“Of course,” Rey nodded. “What do you want me to ask her about?”

“See if she knows anyone who can help us, or if she can help us at all. I know it’s a long shot, but she may have some answers at the very least.” He shrugged. “Just come back here after the other planets and I’ll let you know.”

Poe gave her a lazy salute and watched her go.

Rose ended up tagging along after all.

Rey only knew because Chewbacca stopped her below the landing ramp, growling and irritated.

“What is it, Chewie?” She put a hand on his hairy arm as they walked up the landing ramp. “What did she do?”

The Wookiee kept chattering on, waving a hand in the direction of the cockpit.

“You’re upset that she took the copilot’s seat? Chewie, I can’t always be the copilot. It’ll be fine. She knows how to fly just as well as I do.”

The Wookiee waved a paw at the doorway and whined at her.

“Yes you will,” she lowered her voice. “Rose knows what she’s doing. Let her copilot,” she pouted. “For me?”

Chewbacca grumbled a response and walked in to take his seat in the pilot’s chair. Rey sat down in the common area, only wobbling a little bit when the Falcon lifted off of the ground. She still didn’t quite have her “space legs” as Chewbacca called them. She wondered if she ever would.

She quickly became lost in thought. Kenobi had a point, and Poe had offered them the way to get out of Leia’s old haunts. She hadn’t had the time to consider her options, not with Ben’s request or their incredibly quick return to Naboo.

According to her datapad, Jedha was a half-broken wreck of a planet, even years after the Empire’s end. It was a cold desert, formerly the home of the Jedi and source of their Kyber crystals. It was now a wasteland of bounty hunters and remnants of old rebellion groups, like the ones that belonged to Saw Gererra. Tatooine would be a better option, simply because it was an inhabitable wasteland. Jedha had nothing left to offer.

As for Mon Calamari, Rey feared that the planet was already too much of a target to the First Order. The Mon Calamari had always supported the Rebellion and then the Resistance, offering countless fighters and frigates and military commanders to the cause. And it made them a hated enemy of the First Order.

She would try each place anyways. And she knew Ben would follow her to the ends of the galaxy.

“Where to first?” Rose called from the cockpit. Rey realized they had never chosen a destination. She didn’t know what exactly each planet held, only a quick skimming of the Resistance databases.

She chose at random. “Tatooine?” She replied. “It seems to be the closest.”

After a moment of grumbling in the cockpit, Rose replied, “Tatooine it is!”

She wondered if she had made the right decision as they hurtled into hyperspace. There was no changing it now, though. She brought her knees up to her chest and tried to sleep.

She didn’t sleep easily, feeling a constant nudge and fear that she was leading them into danger. That feeling usually included Ben, though he wasn’t the source of the danger. Still, she forced herself to relax and eventually slept until they were dropping out of hyperspace. She stood out of her seat and found her way into the cockpit.

The yellow orb that was Tatooine occupied most of their view. Its two suns filled the rest.

“They couldn’t find this place for ages because it looked like a third star,” Finn muttered. “Of course, it’s so ugly that it isn’t worth much in the first place.”

Rey couldn’t shake the feeling that she was getting close to Ben. She couldn’t be; he was with the First Order. She blamed it on a close pass through hyperspace.

“Where are we landing?” Finn leaned forward to poke his head between the pilots’ seats. “This place looks really, really sketchy.”

“Mos Eiseley,” Rose looked at him over her shoulder. “The only trading port for miles.”

Chewbacca rumbled about the place not being _that_ rough.

They quietly touched down in the landing bay and Rey stepped out of the ship with Finn and Chewbacca. The Wookiee kept a careful eye out, watching over everyone’s heads as they walked through the street crowds.

“What are we looking for?” Finn hissed at them.

“Allies,” Rey murmured. “Anyone who can help us.”

“And how are we supposed to find them if they’re in hiding and we don’t know what to look for?” The stormtrooper was frustrated. “That’s not how this stuff works!”

Chewbacca grunted at both of them and pointed towards a door that was lowered into the ground.

“A cantina?” Rey frowned, holding a little tighter to her staff.

They walked in and found themselves in a world of loud music and dimmed lights. The sound of the music was underlined by the racket of voices, though they had no idea what was being spoken about.

Rey stuck close to Chewie’s side, keeping her eyes down and her walk even. She knew how these places worked. Looking at someone the wrong way would lead to a whole lot of trouble.

Chewie walked right up to the counter and started talking to the bartender. The ugly creature replied too quietly for her to hear, but the Wookiee’s reaction was enough to tell her that something was wrong.

“What’s going on?” Finn whispered. She could barely hear him over the din in the cantina.

Chewbacca quickly turned and ushered them out of the cantina and back towards the landing bay. He started jabbering at them as soon as they were safe inside the Falcon, saying something about spies and the First Order.

“What? The First Order? I didn’t see a single stormtrooper!”

Chewie roared at them to go to the guns and waved them out of the cockpit. They exchanged a glance and then took the gunner’s seats, Rey taking the bottom gun well while Finn took the top one.

She paused when Ben appeared in front of her, sitting in the cockpit of his TIE silencer. “What are you doing on Tatooine?” He was frustrated. “Did you not see our fleet in orbit?”

“No, we flew straight in!” Rey grabbed onto the controls and ratcheted the cannon into place as they lifted off. She took a deep breath when they banked away from Mos Eiseley. A swarm of TIE fighters was sweeping in towards them, coming from a destroyer on the horizon.

“One of our spies saw you in the cantina,” Ben’s image seemed to distort as his fighter came into view. Rey lost sight of it as the Falcon leveled out, leaving her staring at the ground racing past. She pulled her headset on right in the middle of Rose’s sentence.

“…need to charge! We can’t go yet!” She was saying. They couldn’t flee the planet, not until the Falcon was ready to go.

Rey’s stomach pitched when they dove over the side of a canyon, suddenly showing her the TIEs again. She opened fire, sending one spinning off into the sky and another veering into the canyon.

“Careful,” she saw the moment of fear cross Ben’s face when the fighter next to his shattered into a million pieces.

“Sorry, sorry,” she threw her hands up when Chewie—or maybe Rose, she wasn’t sure, dragged the cannon across the bottom of the canyon, ruining it.

“Why aren’t you firing?” Finn shouted over the headset. She heard his voice double as it rang down the gun well.

“The gun’s gone!” she retorted.

“Hux knows you’re with the Falcon now,” Ben’s face was tight and his voice serious. “I can’t protect you from him any longer. He’s going to try and track you back to the Resistance base.”

Rey couldn’t respond before their connection broke. Ben’s TIE fighter disappeared into blue a moment later when they launched into hyperspace, nearly making her fall onto the glass. She sighed and clambered out of the gun well.

Finn was already waiting for her. “That was a terrible idea,” he grumbled. “Take Tatooine off of the list.”

“I already have,” Rey swiped a hand across her forehead, silently thanking the bartender for the warning.

But she wasn’t out of trouble yet. “Why didn’t you shoot at Kylo Ren?” Finn was suddenly angry, lowering his voice and stepping closer. “We had the chance to kill Kylo Ren, the new Supreme Leader, and you killed the guy next to him!”

“The gun was jammed! You know how they are!” she continued to chatter when his expression didn’t change. “Besides, how was I supposed to hit him in that mess of fighters?”

“You could have at least told me, instead of sitting down there talking to yourself,” she could tell by his tone that he didn’t believe her in the slightest.

“I was talking to Ben,” she protested. As if there was something she was protesting, aside from being caught.

“Yeah, that old Jedi coot? Did he tell you not to shoot Kylo Ren?” Finn turned and walked away.

 

Ben flopped back against his seat as Hux appeared on his hologram projector. “Why didn’t you destroy them?” He shouted. His cheeks were stained red.

“Why didn’t you?” Ben retorted.

“You’re protecting the girl! The Falcon was her only escape!” Hux kicked something out of sight. “What else do you know, traitor? I’m coming with you to find—“ Ben cut the transmission.

He whipped his fighter around and shot back towards the dreadnaught, closing his eyes and rubbing at his forehead. Leading Hux on a wild goose chase was going to be much, much more difficult if he was stuck with the commander right behind him. He would find a way.

And he would find Rey in his own time.

 

The trip to Jedha was quiet with Finn brooding. His usual jokes and comments kept the trips lively; without them, it was too still.

Rey stood after a couple of hours and walked to the radio station. She needed to communicate with Leia. And she needed to get away from the stifling quiet in the cockpit. She grew deaf when she put on the headphones to listen and tuned into the correct frequency.

“Base One, Base One,” she murmured into the headset. “This is the Falcon, can you hear me?”

A long moment of static ensued. “Falcon, do you copy? This is Base One,” Poe’s voice crackled into her ears.

“I copy,” Rey sighed and leaned against the console. “We’ve had no luck so far. The First Order is stationed above Tatooine. We barely escaped a fleet of fighters and found no allies, aside from the bartender who warned us.”

“Affirmative,” Poe replied. “Keep looking.” He sounded fallen. “May the force be with you.”

“May the force be with you,” Rey tugged the headset off and trudged to her pack on the floor to pull her datapad out of it. She might as well do some more research while they traveled. She walked into the captain’s quarters and curled up on the large bed, pulling the curtain closed to hide inside. Chewie had deemed the captain’s quarters to be hers—except for when he wanted them. Which was rarely ever, she had learned.

She pulled a thick blanket around her shoulders—why did Han have to change the ship’s circulation unit to keep it so cold in here?—and leaned back against the headboard.

She would deal with Finn and the rest of the crew later. Finn needed some time to cool off before he was manageable again, and Rose was still high off of the adrenaline rush.

Everything was still so new and foreign to her. It was a strange feeling to be so small in a galaxy so large that she never even knew about. Before Finn and BB-8, her world had been Jakku and the strange blank space that her parents resided in. They were coming back to get her, to take her to the stars. But she didn’t know what was out there. Not really.

Her idea of the universe wasn’t a galaxy-wide war. It wasn’t an idea of a group of Resistance fighters relying on her for their hope. It wasn’t an idea of anything, really.

“What are you thinking about?” Ben’s voice yanked her out of her thoughts. The datapad was untouched on the mattress in front of her. How long had it been? How long had he been there?

“Not long,” he answered her question. She quickly shut him out of her head as she opened the curtain in front of the bed. He was sitting on the floor, his face level with hers. He looked genuinely inquisitive, not as if he was digging for information or trying to trap her.

“You don’t already know?” She fiddled with the edge of her blanket.

He paused. She could see the gears working in his head as he thought through what he was going to say next. “Why are you thinking about this?” Tact was a strange thing to see on him.

“Because I’ve never really thought about it before, and now I have some time to.” she pushed the datapad to the side, tucking it behind the curtain. “I always thought the galaxy was just the stars above Jakku,” she crossed her legs in front of her.

He tilted his head to the side. “The stars that held your parents.” It wasn’t a question or a statement. She didn’t know what that made it. Whatever it was, he was correct.

“The stars that held my parents.” Rey nodded. “They would eventually come and get me and take me to see the galaxy.” She felt the familiar pang of sadness, of hurt. “But somewhere I knew they would never come.”

He felt it too.

“But the galaxy isn’t just the stars above Jakku,” she continued. She had taken solace in the stars over her head, told herself her family was out there somewhere. “It’s so much more.” Her family wasn’t what she had expected, not in the least. Her family was a grouchy old Wookiee and a First Order trooper and a Resistance engineer. It was a daring pilot and his equally risky BB-8 droid. It was two old Skywalkers and their collection of droids and old smugglers.

She didn’t know where Ben fell into that family.

“You’re thinking again,” he leaned closer, resting his elbows on his knees. “About what? I can’t see it.”

“Your place in all of this,” she watched his expression change. His eyes didn’t leave hers, though they softened and his mouth quirked. “And what I’m going to do about it.”

“Show me,” he whispered, rising to sit at her feet. She could feel the force between them, strong enough to let him manipulate the space around her.

“I can’t show you what I don’t know,” she sat forward, drawing her feet in and leaning towards him. His dark eyes searched her face. She wasn’t uncomfortable being that close to him anymore. Not like she used to be. They sat in silence until she spoke again.

“Thank you,” she breathed. “For what you did on Tatooine.”

He tentatively reached out, his hand nearly flinching away from her face. His touch was warm against her cheek. “I’d do it again.”

She leaned into his touch, then lost it when the Falcon shuddered out of hyperspace. Ben was gone. She wondered if she was letting him come too close, letting him see too much. He was the leader of the First Order and the Knights of Ren. He was a monster, someone who had done unspeakable things in the name of an evil organization. She had no reason to trust him, never mind speak to him.

But still she did.

Another jolt reminded her of the task at hand. She had to face Jedha.

Rey pushed herself out of bed and left the captain’s quarters.


End file.
